As noted in a prior post, sometimes litigants claim to be God. There’s one such lawsuit I didn’t mention in that post because it’s one of my favorites. And, once again, it’s from a Pennsylvania federal court.
“Joseph Mallon, God” filed 11 separate lawsuits in 1992. The defendants included Harvard Law School, the People of England, and “United States Presidency of George Bush.” The court’s initial explanation is perhaps a good start.
Summarizing Mr. Mallon’s complaints is difficult because there is no common factual thread running between them. A few general themes, however, can be detected. Mr. Mallon signs most of his complaints as “Honor Holiness God (Judge of God’s Court) President Joseph Mallon.” He claims to be the “possessor” of “a valid U.S. Presidency” and that various entities have refused to “regard” his presidency.
What interest me, though, was his obsession with Chrissie Hynde, the leader of the Pretenders. In his lawsuit. Mallon said Hynde was his wife, she was “not doing her part,” was “too far away,” and “didn’t communicate” with him. As a result, “I demand all that she is, and has, as a very minimum of at least that, and plus, I demand my children from her, too; in other words, I demand as compensation, all of my wife’s and our my children’s possessions, life, and even rights, and I have to own and possess all that is of my wife and children.”
To be thorough, Mallon also sued the Pretenders and Hynde’s parents. He claimed the band didn’t “deal with” a communication to them and injured him by moving to England. As for Hynde’s parents, he alleged they “cut off all postal service communication and telephone communication from me to Akron, Ohio,” and England, where Hynde was residing. He also said he sent a book he wrote to “his wife” by way of Akron but it was sent back without “being dealt with.”
Not surprisingly, the court said Mallon’s lawsuits were “quite devoid of any merit.” Moreover, it said, “To conclude that Mr. Mallon’s complaints are factually ‘fanciful’ is an understatement.” Not only did the judge dismiss them as frivolous, but he also entered an injunction barring Mallon from filing any documents with the court without the court’s prior approval. To obtain that approval, Mallon would have to certify specific factors about the filings.
Oh no, we’ll never
We’ll never be together
Never, never
We’ll never be together
Pretenders, “Never Be Together,” Alone
