Friday Follies 3.9

French riot police are threatening a strike over fundamental legal principles: the “right to drink alcohol with our food”, even while on duty. (via)

Judge guts gut feeling defense.

If you open your appellate brief challenging a rape conviction by quoting Mike Tyson spouting an obscenity, you are off on the wrong foot.

Hey, Festus, I got me an idea. Let’s steal the judge’s gavel!

Was Festus the one in court acquitted of trespass for toting a pitchfork into a county administration building to “make a political” statement”?

How not to impress a judge: oppose a motion for continuance that’s based on someone giving birth, especially when one of your arguments is basic math skills should have allowed you to figure out the potential conflict months ago. It leads to the judge to call this an example of being “unprofessional.”

An Ohio man was cited after he engaged in a barking contest with a police dog. His defense? The dog started it. (via)

Appellate counsel’s attempts to sugarcoat these shocking events as just one of [defendant’s] and T.C.’s typical date nights that went “horribly awry” gives pulp fiction a bad name.

Montana v. Belanus, 2010 MT 204

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